Part 2. What can you do to help solve relationship problems?
1. You need to be aware of passive or controlling behaviours.
2. You need to be aware of blurred boundaries where there is only
“we” and never “I”.
3. You need to ensure that there is never just “I” and never “we”.
4. Beware of always interrupting your partner and not letting them
Finish what they are saying.
5. Beware of automatically blaming your partner.
6. You need to listen to what each of you are saying.
Fully hearing what is actually being said.
Fully understanding what has been said.
Give time to absorb and not just react.
7. How does your partner know what you want?
Do you tell them?
Do you say it clearly enough in words that can be understood that
not only convey your thoughts but also your feelings?
8. Constantly turn towards each other not away.
9. No matter what your problem someone else has faced it as well.
You can seek support from relatives or friends, and some may be brilliant, but it is difficult for them as they have a vested interest – you are their best friend, son, daughter, brother,sister. This is where a therapist can help as they are totally neutral. They are there for both of you as you talk about very difficult and sensitive issues and take decisions about your future.
Contact Autonomy Counselling and Psychotherapy for help with your relationship issues.